What Echoes in Eternity
by TheYukiii
Summary: One day Edward and Roy were put on a mission aimed at destroying a train station, but something goes incredibly wrong and they are separated from each other. Will they ever find each other again and be together? *Yaoi-LEMON-RAPE plus18,angst*
1. The golden fields and the passionate kis

_"Edward ... What we do in life .. Echoes in Eternity. "_

* * *

He could feel his hands began to sweat because of nervousness. Moisture quickly spread to the rest of his body and he felt as if he had a lump in my throat. He turned his eyes and his attention to the window and the landscape as quietly moved outside. The fields were golden as his hair and his eyes. His eyes were as determined as a 900 year old oak which had withstood all the world's storms. His red jacket was the same glow as the sunset in the wide horizon and the rest of him was just as tense and quiet as a predator on the hunt. As much on guard, he blinked a few times before he turned his gaze from the man toward him.

"And what was it exactly we were going to do?" he asked with a voice of irritation. He would not be in the company of this man, unless that course was necessary. Not only because of his personal feelings towards him, but also that he could not show them publicly. But since the circumstances demanded it, he could only wait and be annoyed. The man lifted his gaze from his papers and looked at the young alchemist with a certain eyes.

"We must destroy a train stadium. It has long been the observation of terrorists against the military, but only now confirmed. It is situated not far from the border to the north." His gaze returned to his paperwork and smiled briefly to himself. "Have you not read your mission report?"

The young alchemist ignored the question and turned again look to the landscape which flew past. After a few seconds he nevertheless broken the silence with a quiet "Yes I have, but I still can not see why _**we**_ should do it…"

The older alchemist sighed, lied the papers in a folder and placed it beside him. He placed his elbows on his knees and looked up. Their eyes caught one another. "You must do it because I have to do it. Since it is me who has been responsible for the mission, I have selected the men who I think can do the job. And you're one of them Edward." He stood up briefly and kissed the young alchemist gently on the lips, and smiled easily.

Edward closed his eyes half and so unhappy out. He knew that it was not anything to do. When Colonel Roy Mustang gives an order it is best to follow it. Edward swung head from side to side. "Are you okay?" asked the colonel. Edward stopped the movement and looked at him. "Yeah ..." he answered quietly and mass already his head slightly. "I have had a little crick, I think ..."

The rest of the trip was going slowly and quietly. It was good because then Edward had good to think through the mission from the point to the letter. They were first and foremost get the terrorists who were on the station. Easy it would not be as they mingled with the ordinary civilian runway work. The worst cases they had to blow up train station in pieces. Besides Roy and Edward were at least 23 others on the mission together, but the two distinctive personalities were the only state alchemists. Edward and Mustangs civil relationship had been going on for some time now but was a deep secret. Their work relationship was probably not the best in the world, but they could easily work together if it was a necessity. They were the only ones in their train compartment. Edward might well find it distracting to have Roy sitting opposite him. Mostly because he wanted to kiss the man, tearing his clothes off and just touch him. It did not do much better that he felt that Roy always dressed him in the eye also to control himself. Edward sighed inside.

The plan was that all mission participants should arrive to the station as ordinary civilians except two soldiers. Under the plan, the two soldiers take the enemy's attention with their uniforms. After this they would storm the rest of the group station and its buildings. A reasonable simple plan that could quickly end badly. Edward could see that the landscape began to disappear due to the darkness. He looked over at Roy Edwards as the big surprise was asleep. He smiled slightly to himself.

"Knock, knock" was heard from the door and Edward turned his eyes toward the door.

"Yes?"

The door opened and a soldier stench main action. "We should be at the station around. thirty minutes. Will you wake colonel and say that he is about to change his clothes? "

Edward nodded, and the soldier closed the door and walked again. Edward stood up and walked the small steps toward Roy. He placed his hand on his cheek and was beginning to call him.

"Roy? ... Roy? Wake up ... We need to change clothes. "

He sighed. The older man was completely gone. Suddenly the train made an unexpected jump, and something grabbed Edward and pulled him down. "Waah!" He yelled surprised. His lips met Roy in a kiss as he had expected and hoped for the whole day. Edward tried to get up, but Roy still held firmly in him. The young alchemist suddenly felt like prey and asked that its superior had already started to eat him. Roy knew that it was like this Edward wanted to be. To ashes, he in a moment when he least expected it. Roy pulled up in Edwards shirt and began to lick one of his nipple. Edward swung head back and moaned slightly. He enjoyed it very special as it was unexpected, but he also knew well that they had no time with him.

"Mmm .. Roy .. We have .. no time now ... "groaned Edward. Roy laughed a little.

"I will just help you… to get you out of your clothes faster."

"But ..." Edward could not resist. His whole body screamed for Roy and before he knew it was Roy opened his belt. He mass already her lover penis with extreme caution to tease him. He knew what Edward could endure, but he wanted him to beg for it. Edward groaned and forgot all about public places and disk ration.

" 'No but' Edward ... I want you .. now ..!" This was Roy's last words before his mouth engulfed Edwards erection.

"Ahh ...! Ohh ..! Roy ... I ... " It went quickly up to Edward that he could not compose an intelligible sentence. Roy pulled Edward pants and underwear down his legs and began touching and massaging his balls. Edward shook his head and could not foresee all the feelings that welled up in him. He felt warm. A creeping sense of lust crawled around inside him. The feeling caused him to put his fingers into Roy's hair, stick and pull his head back. A bit shocked by this act Roy looked at Edward with questioning eyes. Edward smiled briefly and kissed the dark haired man. His free hand was down to Roy's pants and began to open them. He handed down after Roy's erection and grabbed it. A groan disappeared from Roy's mouth into the Edwards and the young alchemist grinned slightly.

"You need not be the only one who does something ..." said Edward, trying to hide his shyness. He pushed down Roy so he lied on his seat, took off his red jacket and placed himself over him. Edward took Roy's erection and started massaging it gently before he took it in his mouth and began to lick at it. Groans and other sounds escaped across from the two men's' mouth. A few minutes later, Edward came first time in Roy's mouth. When he tried to turn around to apologize but Roy restrained him in his position. Roy sat up, licked her lips still with Edward bending over his legs.

" Never… Excuse… Pleasure… Edward ..." whispered Roy and took one of his fingers in his mouth to made it wet.

"But ..." Edward started to say, but he was stopped. A mixture of pain and lust captured his body and he felt that he lost the ability to speak. Roy had inserted a finger in Edward's entrance and the young alchemist could not take it. Number two finger was inserted a few seconds later. Edward screamed a groan when Roy pressed him on his weak spot.

"It is .. It is unfair.. Roy ... " groaned Edward. Roy grinned a little and smiled a cunning smile. "In war and love is all tricks may be used Edward." The comment was the whole basis of their relationship. As soon as the opportunity was there, it should be utilized. Edwards groans reached new heights when Roy pulled his fingers out of him. He spat into his palm and made his erection wet.

"Ready Edward?"

"Is that a question?"

Edward nodded and sent Roy a sexy smile. Roy swollen Edwards hips, sat them down and inserted his erection in Edwards opening.

"Uh ..! Roy ..! "Edward groaned.

"Edward ..." although Roy could not stop. He wanted more. His love for Edward was endless and the feeling he got when he was with him was the happiest he had ever felt. Roy's movements began to gain momentum and Edward gasped more than before.

"... I love you .." whispered Roy.

_'That's so cheating'_ thought Edward. _'Three little words and he knows that I can be forgive him for everything.'_

"Edward .. I ..! " panted Roy. The sweat dripped down his face. He still had a firmly hold in Edwards hips. So hard that it probably would give marks afterwards. Roy leaned over Edward and grabbed the young alchemist erection. This was unexpected for Edward when he already had one once. Roy mass already and lets off steam with it, and Edward had the biggest urge to scream of pleasure.

"Roy ..." Edward gasped. Roy tightened its grip on his lover. He placed a finger in the young alchemist mouth and let him lick it. "Ed …ward… came with me ... "Roy moaned in longing. Edward nodded and bit into Roy's little finger.

Both men derived a larger synchronic panting and collapse. They both took deep breaths and shortly after Edward turned around and kissed Roy gently on the mouth. His fingers stroked through Roy's black hair and enjoyed the sight of her lover.

"You were right anyway ... I think that we have 15 minutes to change your clothes." Edward said with a smile. Roy nodded. Edward made a deep exhalation and Roy withdrew from him. Edward personally enjoyed every second of Roy was inside him, but he also knew that they had a mission. Perhaps therefore he was a little mad at older man. To have sex as close to a mission that could mean he would lose focus.

Their relationship started by Edward lost focus. In a brief moment in Roy's library had Edward read a romance novel by a writer named Ciqin. The book was about a woman who tried to find a man who had given her something that she wanted to give back, but she could not find him. He read in it while he waited for the older alchemist and Roy discovered it. The dark haired alchemist had gone to Edward, sat on the chair beside him and talked to him and for the first time they had a great conversation and Edward had a few hours askedif he could kiss Roy. This little kiss quickly developed into lust and a couple of days later love. Roy confessed opposite Edward after the kiss, that he could not get him out of his head. Just as shocked Edward had agreed to date his colonel, and approx. 7 weeks later they began to sleep with each other. Edward could clearly remember the uncertainty, the pain, the sounds and the smell in the room, but from the second when Roy came into him he forgot the whole world and only thought of Roy.

As much as Edward wanted to share the world with Roy he knew well that it was not an option since they were both in the military. So to be on the safe side no one knew of their private relationship. Not Al, not Hawkeye, Winry or any other. They only had themselves. It had been since they began to come together around. 2 years ago. How they had hide it as long as they had they did not know, but it was as a part of everyday life now.

Roy stood up and began to take the rest of his uniform off. Edward enjoyed the sight and could have been drooling over this wonderful and beautiful body. He did not know how he could have lived without Roy, but he also had his brother. Alphonse had gone through a successful transmutation and got his body back, unfortunately it was not gone well for Edward and therefore he still wore his auto-mail body parts. He had been nervous about how Roy would react to his auto-mail, but the older man considered his artificial parts with the same care as if they were genuine. This gave Edward a satisfaction of infinite dimensions.

When Roy was dressed plain clothes Edward stood, looked up and kissed his lover with great passion. "It's not like you to kiss first ... so deep .." whispered Roy. Edward smiled and thought 'this is so rare that I see you in plain clothes ... " He began to confess his own clothes, and might well feel that having sex with Roy had put his focus on the mission. Wonder if Roy had had it the same way?

"5 minutes" was shouted through the train. Edward sighed and turned toward the window. Roy hugged him from behind.

"Are you ready?" asked Roy. Roy had shown clear signs of whether or not he should have taken Edward to this mission here, but he knew that if he gave Edward another action, their relationship would be discovered easily.

Edward nodded and turned around, Roy hugged and kissed him gently on the lips and whispered in his ear. "I love you Roy."

They gave each other one last kiss and left the cabin one at a time. Roy first. Edward stopped and looked down. A couple of Roy's special alchemy gloves lay on the floor. If terrorists looked through the train and took them it would probably cause problems. Without further hesitation, he took them into his pocket and joined all the others. Roy was up front. He waved his hands to get people's attention.

"This is it folks! Stick to the plan and use the whistle if something goes wrong!" Everyone nodded, looking at their clothes, took their suitcases containing arms and other. The train began to slow down and the excitement in the hall rose. Everyone was nervous. Apart from Edward, Roy and the two who would be the soldiers in blue uniforms were all others unarmed until they opened their baggage. The train were almost at the end now, and Edward took a deep breathing. This was not his first mission, but the first who would be so extensive. About the mission ended in success or failure would occur depends on factors of the unseen dimensions.

The train stopped. Everyone began to leave. Edward just managed to see a small glimpse of Roy before his love came down on the platform. Corridor began to empty itself, and no long there was only Edward back.

He took a deep breath and went out on the platform.

To be continued…

* * *

This is my first fanfiction on my own. Hope you like it ;=)


	2. The last hope and I love you

Edward stepped down from the train, onto the platform and looked around. There were many people. Not only those he already knew, but workers and salesmen. In a brief second he wanted to look for Roy but dropped the idea fast. He took his luggage and continued towards the station house. His part of the operation was to prevent possible terrorist to attack from the main road. It was very quiet. Except the noise you normally hear at a train station in the evening everything else was quite. Edward could feel that somebody was watching him. He couldn't blame them. He was in his early twenties, had light hair in a pony tail and his clothes made him look like a farmer.

He watched the two blue uniforms enter the station house throw the sliding door. He sighed and followed them. Seconds later he heard a gun shoot. First he looked around like everyone else. 'What happened?' he thought. He dropped everything in his hands and ran into the booth. He tried to act like everyone else would have done.

"There was a gun shoot outside!" he yelled. The man in the booth panicked and could the police. The two blue uniform looked at each other. They knew that they had to act normal. They followed Edward outside and they began to look around. Edward grabbed his stuff and went around the station house instead of though it. He walked around the corner looking at the two blue uniforms and then…

"Umf!"

He stopped. He had walked into an extreme tall man. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry" Edward apologised. The tall man smiled at him. "Don't worry about it my boy. Things like that happens. Are you okay?" Edward nodded and smiled. Suddenly two more gun shoots were fired and Edward turned around and suddenly he felt an instant pain in the back of his head.

"What…?" was all he managed to say before he felt to the ground.

* * *

"How in the world did they find us?!"

"How should I know?!"

Edward could hear several voice. He had his eyes closed and pretended to be asleep.

"All we got is this boy here! They already caught half of us!"

'_Yes…'_ Edward thought. _'That means Roy and the others are doing fine.' _

Edward began to wonder how long he had been in this place. It was very cold and the air itself were like ice. His hands were tight behind his back and he sat on the floor in the room.

"All we have is him! One hostage?! We can't negotiate with one hostage!"

Edward's head hurt. He wanted to open his eyes and see the men who had kidnapped him. Roy came into his mind.

'Roy… Save me… please…'

One of the men walked over to Edward. It gave him the shiver.

"Colonel!" someone shouted from the outside. "I can see one of them!"

"Shit! He saw me Ralph!"

"Get away from the window you idiot!"

Edward could hear some movement and some mobilize under him. He could fell the men's footstep in the floor.

"Show yourself now!" a man yelled

'_Roy?!'_ Edward thought.

"You are surrounded and you can't escape. Surrender now!"

"Never!" one of the men yelled back. "We have a hostage! Do anything funny and he will be a dead hostage!"

"A hostage..?" Roy mumbled and raised an eyebrow. "Show me!"

Edward could fell a massive force drag in him. He was held to his feet and the cold air stroked him directly in his face. He could hear a huge gasp around him.

"It's Fullmetal!" some yelled. Others yelled bastard and cowards after them. Edward opened his eyes slowly and looked down. He was about 20 meters above the ground. His eyes caught Roy's glance. Roy looked like he had seen a ghost. Edward tried up keep his eyes open, but it was hard. The pain in the back of his head became worse.

"You know this kid?" the strong man holding Edward asked. He looked at Edward.

"What a minute.. " The other one said. "Fullmetal.. I have heard that name before… shit! He's a state alchemist!"

"What?! This little one?!"

Edwards eyes began to burn. You could call him many things, but little… He began to twist and turn his whole body. He tried to get his arms free. He knew his cover were shoot dead so now he needed to get away. Edward bid and screamed his lungs out. Apparently the strong let go of Edward. The young alchemist stood at his feet trying to keep his head cold. He could see two men. One smaller them himself and the other bigger then Major Armstrong.

"Edward! Jump!" he heard Roy yell from behind.

He took a little step backwards. "Get him!" screamed the little man. Edward took one more step backwards but he was not fast enough. The big already had him in his grip.

"Let me go!"

"Now, now.." a third voice said. Two other men came into the room. They was tall and more normal looking. "You are en alchemist right?" the one asked.

Edward look at him, but didn't answer him. "I will ask you again.. You are an alchemist.. right?" Again Edward didn't answer. "well…" the man said in a low voice. He turned briefly away from Edward, but stopped. Turning fast around and hit Edward on the side of his head.

"Argh!" Edward cried out loud. Blood flowed down his cheek and eyes so his one eye became blind.

"He is kind of cute.." the fourth one said "I will take him. The military has taking so much from us and since we are going the die here anyway…"

'_Take me..? how..?'_ Edward thought. He had to get out from there.

A gun shoot was fired and the small man dropped dead on the floor next to Edward. The fourth man pulled forward a knife and placed its blade in his mouth. "Now…" he said sarcastic. "Little mister state alchemist.. We are going to have a little fun right?"

'No… you don't mean…!' The man cut his shirt up and threw it into the corner. "NO!" Edward cried out loud but the man only grinned. Edward was in much pain and couldn't control his alchemy. The big man grabbed him and throw him over to the window. Edward grabbed the windowsill and pulled himself up. "Edward!" Roy yelled and then gasped. He looked at his men. "How long time can it take to get your men up there?!" "Roy…" Edward almost whispered. He looked down at the people standing underneath him and sighed. He reached up his hand in a attempt to caught Roy. The older alchemist held up his hands, trying to give Edward hope. A little smile and a tear fall down Edwards face, and suddenly it disappeared. A huge pain from his anus made him scream so fearful that it made everyone gasp. "Argh!" Edward screamed. "No! don't!" He looked down. "Roy…" he fainted. "Edward!" cried out lout. The men dragged Edward inside again and Roy lost Edward from his eyesight. He shook his head and looked into the ground. 'This can't be…'

A man came running "Colonel! We are ready!" Roy looked up. "You have order to kill at first sight… understood?!"

Seconds later a huge explosion from inside the room caught everyone's attention.

"No…" Roy mumbled and shook his head. This was not part of the plan.

"They are gone sir!"

"What?! Find them!"

"Over there!"

From the long distance Roy could see the bigger man carried Edward on his shoulders. A wise move. Then neither Roy or the snipers could do nothing. But where were they going?

"What's that way?" Roy asked fast.

"A river, sir."

"What! Why is it not covered?"

The men looked at each other until one said. "That was Full metal job. To stop them if they went that way."

"After them!" Roy yelled and 16 men jump after the three men and the unconscious alchemist.

* * *

10 minutes later and the three men had reached the river. A bout was there, waiting for them. Meanwhile, Edward was starting to get a grip of himself. He had been kidnapped.. and raped.. in front of others.. in front of Roy… He could never face his lover again. Now.. he just wanted to die. He was cold and he couldn't move a muscle.

_'Roy… I'm so sorry…'_

"What should we do with this guy?" the big one asked.

"We can kill him later! Come on!"

They entered the bout and sailed out on the huge river. The current was really strong the men had to put up a fight against mother nature just to get over to the other side. Edward was in front of the bout.

"Stop!" Roy's voice yelled from the shore. Edward's mind made a twist and he went berserk. He transmuted his auto-mail to his fighting sword. He looked up at the man who raped him and speared him right in his back.

"Argh! You little! Awwh!"

Edward pulled his arm back. He made one movement and cut the head of the big man. The last man screamed and jumped into the river. Edward was now alone in the bout covered in blood and feeling half dead.

"Edward! Catch the rope!"

The young alchemist looked over at the shore and saw the man he loved throw a long rope. It landed on the bout. Edward looked at it and couldn't decide what to do.

"Pick it up Full metal!" people yelled. "You can do it!"

Edward turned slowly, looked at them and shook his head. He wanted to cry but he couldn't.

"Edward! Please!" Roy yelled. The current became more powerful by the second. Edward took the rope, kissed it and throw it back in the water. His mind were made up. He could never be with Roy again. He didn't want to. In his mind hundreds of voices yelled at him for being a coward. He just shook his heard. He look at Roy for the last time and lip-read to him: 'I love you…'

"Edward! don't!"

The young alchemist leaned himself backwards and fell into the strong river. The water absorbed him the second he touched the surface. The combination of cold water and lost energy Edward fainted once more and made the river to be his guide.

___________

Up on the shore Roy had completed lost it. Along with many others he cried his eyes out. _'Why…?'_ he thought. _'We could have saved you god dammit!'_

"Colonel?" a soldier said quiet.

"What?" Roy mumbled.

"We need to report to the others. We have sent 4 others to look for full metal's…"

Roy swallowed and stood to his feet. He knew there was no way that Edward could have survived the cold water. He took a deep breath and followed the soldier back to the city. He stopped for a second and looked at the river again. He sighed and another tear felt down his cheek.

"I have to contact his family…"

The other soldier nodded.

_____________

A year later went slow for Roy. After giving the news of Edwards death Alphonse had had a break down. Roy himself had entered a depression of unknown dimensions. He didn't eat or sleep. His personal staff were worried. He was off work for 5 month but when he came back he lost his mind. Every time he was dressed in his military uniform could he see Edward in front of him.

After 6 month the military declared Edward dead and buried him on the same graveyard as his mother. An empty grave since they had never found his body. So now a year had went by. In the occasion the military had sent two men to the river for a last chance of a hope to find something.

Roy knew he had to move on. He still hadn't told anybody about him and Edward. He could fell his heart twisted from time to time. This day he had a meeting with some of the generals. He didn't mind. Every single one at headquarters thought that Roy had changed from a handsome living man to a handsome living dead. He was ach grey on his face and didn't really talk much. Mostly 'yes', 'no' and 'you don't say' was all he could manage.

The meeting started and Roy acted like he had been for the last year. Not even a single smile had been visible on his lips since that day. He still thought of Edward a lot. Every moment of everyday. His whole life was now empty and full of silence… until…

The door opened itself wide without a knock.

"General Jones!" the soldier felted out.

The general stood up and received a map filled with pictures. He opened it and read out loud:

"Up summing rapport on: The Full Metal Alchemist Edward Elric...? Can't this wait?"

Roy signed. _'Great'_ he thought.

"No sir," the soldier insisted. "look here. The picture." The general grabbed his glasses and gave a gasp.

"What is it?" one of the others asked. General Jones looked at them. "It is a picture of a blond man running with a auto-mail leg and arm…"

be to continued

_____

**Author notes: Am I to evil? I hope not ^^; Hope you liked it. There will be some days now where I wouldn't update.. sry.. my parents 25 wedding anniversary.. But I will be back ^_^ hope you liked the second chapter and see you soon.**


	3. Eden and the snow looking beauty

At the train station people were starting to gather. Hundreds of blue uniforms were everywhere. As long as the eye could see the military had assembled the biggest search party in many years. The goal? To find the Full metal Alchemist alive.

Even Roy was there. After seeing the picture he felt bad. After the meeting was finished he had went to the bathroom to throw up. _'How could this be…? Edward.. alive..?'_ His mind twisted in the sink and he felt like screaming his lungs out. _'Why haven't he not come back…?' _he had so many questions that only one person could answer. _'I am going to find you Edward.'_ He thought and joined his group. Lt. Hawkeye, Lt. Havoc and Warrant officer Fuery were the chosen ones to accompany him.

Everyone were to be divided into groups in case of ambush. These high land were know to be the home of murders, traitors, deserters and others who one way or anything were socially band from the rest of the country. The high lands were also the area of exiled people. In other words:

'The Land without a single law'. If someone got killed up there then there would not be a law to give the killer justice.

Roy felt a sense of fiery and angry. He shook his head to try and find a meaning in this. This of course gave him a headache.

"Don't worry sir." Said Hawkeye. "Now that we know that he is alive it will be alright."

Roy looked at her and gave her the first little smile that his mouth had been make in the last year.

"Sir?" she asked a couple of seconds later when they were alone. "Permission to speak freely?"

Roy nodded and she took a deep breath. "Is there anything between you and Edward? I know it's not appropriate, but these last years I made a pattern. Every time Edward was on a mission you tend to work more. Maybe to forget time? When he came back you became more normal." She continued.

Roy looked at her. He hadn't thought of it like that. As always he was amazed by his lieutenant. After thinking about it for a few second he nodded discreet. He sighed and said in almost silent, "we began being lovers about three years ago…"

She smiled. She was not surprised. Now everything made more sense to her. She gave Roy a little pat on his back and said, "don't worry, sir. Your secret is safe with me." Roy nodded and in a second felt relieved for a second. The other second a huge sound of a trumpet sounded. All groups were ready. Some men handed over search areas maps for the individual groups to follow. Instructions were given to the highest ranking officer of the group. A picture of Edward, information about his looks and where he last were seen was a slight relieve for Roy. The trumpet sounded again and the search began.

* * *

_A couple of days later._

Without a worry in the deep high land sat a man on the ground. Fall was almost over, but it wasn't cold yet. He was stirring in the water of a minor stream and watching the small fish fight their way through the day. Normally when he saw fish he began to feel hungry, but not today. For some properly silly reason he wasn't hungry. All of his focus was on however the fish.

"Eden? What are you doing?" a woman's voice asked behind him. He didn't turn around. He knew the voice so he remained calm. He raised his hand however and waved so she knew that she had his attention. She walked up to the man and sat by his side.

"Something's wrong?" she asked. She knew that it was a lost course. In the past year the man called 'Eden' had lived with her had he barely even spoke a full sentence, so on that background she didn't expect an answer. Everything until the day she and some others had found his cold and lifeless body at the river bred, he couldn't remember anything about himself. At first they had looked at him with odd eyes. His right arm and left leg were of metal and despite his young age his body were covered with scars. So many of his finders thought that he was a hit man. A visible scar had appeared across his forehead be course a huge wound. They weren't in doubt that he had been in a fight, but he couldn't remember anything. When he woke up he started screaming like he were in pain. The woman had sat by his side and comforted him like she had know him her entire life.

Later on they found the problem. He had completely lost every knowledge about who he was before he was found. In the beginning was it like dealing with a baby, there was trying to find its way through life, but it got better. Soon after he smiled to her the first time she named him 'Eden'. The word for paradise. Simply because of his smile.

He sat on squat, turned his head to her face and smiled a little. He liked her. Not in a sexual way or anything, but he was in love with her aura. She had long dark hair that lied peacefully over her one shoulder. Her face was as white as the new falling snow and around her eyes was this red colour that made this wonderful contrast to her pacific blue eyes. Eden knew that the white and red in her face was make-up but he felt some attraction about her. She always wore such colourful clothes. A complete contrast to the mountain high lands where they lived.

"You silly boy." She smiled and stood up. She reached her hand to him. "Come. Lets go home." He took her hand and she pulled him up. They walked along the stream and felt wind in their faces. Eden ran a little forward, turned around and gave her a smile that was worth all the beauty in the world. She felt warm when he was happy. The wind caught his long, blond hair and he ran his fingers thought it with huge elegance.

Even do he was happy she knew he missed something… the day they had found him was he only wearing white destroyed pants and inside his pockets they had found a pair of white gloves with a red symbol on them. The pair was almost destroyed. Just like his body. His body was in a horrible shape and they didn't think, that he was going to make it. For some reason he had kept the gloves. Hoping that he could find the owner and return them. He knew that it wasn't his. The gloves were to big, but that was not her biggest worry.

'_However…'_ she thought. He could speak… and he could scream. In the beginning he had screamed his lungs out in the nights because of nightmares and when he wanted to tell what he had dreamed about he couldn't remember. Sometimes a name came out of his mouth while he was asleep and she feared that the person with this name would take him from her.

"Make sure you don't take a fall." She said in a motherly tone. She didn't have children of her own, but she was old enough to be this boy's mother. A mother however should be able to help her child… but he missed something… just like her. He properly saw what he missed in his dreams. He properly tried to reach for it, but the distance would be to far away. This were what there was on her mind all the time. If he had lost his entire memory then he would not miss anything from his pasted life… but he did. She sighed, waited a second and smiled back to the beautiful boy in front of her.

He began to ran towards an opening in the forest near the mountain foot and she followed. He walked into a small valley and saw a man smiling to him.

"There you are boy!" the man yelled. "About time. We were beginning to think that you were lost." Some other men laughed and the blond man gave them a giddy smile. "But seriously kid, be careful. I have seen a lot of military men walking into the forest." He sighed and continued "Ciqin says that we can't kill them until we don't have other choices." The man was slim and muscle but don't be fooled. He was old… He stood up and went over to the boy, patted him on his head and looked at the woman summing from the forest opening. "By the way Ciqin… When have we reached your limits? We can't keep running from the military... they are everywhere."

The woman shook her head. She knew that he was right. They couldn't keep running. She spread a golden fan and waved it in her face. She look over her assembly. She sighed and went over to the slim man.

"I know Anthony… I know…" she whispered.

He lied a hand on her shoulder. "There most be a good reason for them to come here…" the tall man concluded. "I mean everyone here is in exile anyway. Expect Eden."

The blond man gave him an evil eye and the others laughed. "Come on kid..! show me what you got!" Eden did not wait for another invitation and jumped in the mans face. It started a fight for fun and the woman called Ciqin grinned. Anthony stood by her side.

"Are you alright?" he asked.

"Yeah… I just… this boy… where does he come from?"

"Wow, it's not like you to think about other peoples past."

"No."

"So why? Do you like him?"

"No."

"Then tell me."

She turned her glance to the man and smiled at him. "Not now. I need to find out why the military are here. But… Be ready for battle if it goes so far."

"Wait, wait! Are you going alone?"

"Yeah." she answered coldly and concentrated. "I'm the only one the military won't recognize."

"That's true. Just be careful okay?"

She nodded and went to a little chest that stood on a huge rock. She opened it, took a little unknown thing up in her hands which were a kind of similar to a small stick.

"Wow…!" gasped Anthony and took a closer look. "Are you going to attack them?"

"Only if they attack me first." She replied and he nodded. "If I'm not back by tomorrow evening, you have orders to take the others to the 'Valley of Grief'." She said in a determined voice. He nodded once more, went to the little chest and closed it.

"You know…" he started. "After Eden joined this group you have become more.. human. Just be careful that it wouldn't get in the way of the way you fight." She turned and smiled to him. The wind gave a slight breeze and the sound of the forest caught the attention of most of the men.

"They are close." Some men said. Other nodded and went for their weapons.

"Not yet." Ciqin said holding up her fan. "They maybe close but there is only one way in and out of this valley. If we or them choose to fight… We will go to the Valley of Grief… but to yet." Her voice where beautiful and elegant. Eden stood up and pointed at himself. Cipin looked at the boy and seemed surprised.

"You want to come with me?"

He nodded and a little "_yes…"_ went over his lips.

____________

Authors note:

Hey you guys! Chapter three is done! **Big weee!** I have to say that it was very difficult to write. Not only because of I haven't slept very much (lie) the past couple of days but there was so much I wanted to put into this chapter.. It's what is called: self editing… _ otherwise it would confuse you.. But I will be back soon with a new chapter!

If anyone is curios about the character 'Ciqin' about how she looks like (well how I imagine her) they can go into Deviant art home page and search for Ciqin.

I made her as a cosplay project. I know it's pretty selfish to cosplay your own characters, but I.. well I was bored, and it was snowing and I love cosplay.. so what to do..? hope you like it if you click on it and I will see you in the next chapter. Let me know if you liked, have critic, or just something on your heart 3

And thank you for all your loving reviews and story alerts/favourites 3

TheYukiii~~


	4. Through the leaves of the tree

**Authors note: **

**Hey everyone! I'm so sorry this chapter first is ready now… Reason? My whole computer died the day after I uploaded the last chapter, all the other fanfics I write on.. gone.. Luckily I had back-up for the most, but Liporachi Love's ending and chapter 4-6 + the ending for WEIE (this story) died a pretty horrible death… ;_; I will write most weekend so I can bring more Roy x Edward to the world :3 those two are just… Argh! This is not the point, again sorry, and I will do my best to upload faster 3**

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The first snow of the year had showed itself. And after nine days of searching the high lands people were beginning to become a little impatient. It's still wasn't very cold but people started to doubt that the Full Metal Alchemist still was alive. But for one person the hope was still going strong. Roy Mustang had been in a serious relationship with the young alchemist up till his disappearance about a year ago. After his lovers disappearance he went into a deep depression. If they didn't find Edward this time… the idea of losing his lover again was to big so he tried not to think about it.

"Colonel!" A voice snapped him out of his thought. He turned and looked around. A familiar face came running down a hill and they made eye contact.

"Could you find a way out of here Fuery?" yelled Lt. Havoc.

"Yeeaaah…! Argh!" a misstep caused Fuery to lose his balance. The little man fell down the slope and landed with his head first in front the Colonel, Lt. Hawkeye and Lt. Havoc. They stood on a narrow path that let to a blind end.

"Geez Fuery…" said Havoc itching on the back of his head. "Be careful. If you hadn't noticed we are like…" Havoc looked down the slope a second but his glance returned fast, "very high up…" he swallowed at the end of his sentence.

"Well," started Hawkeye, "that properly why they call this 'the high lands' right?"

Fuery laughed a little at Havoc and Roy sighed of their discussion. He felt reckless. They had been stranded on this slope for some hours now and Roy felt like screaming at someone. He reached out his hand and helped Fuery up. "Sorry about that Colonel…" Roy smiled a little.

"But did you find anything?"

Fuery looked up. "Yes sir but we have to climb a little or…. A lot."

Roy nodded and grinned a little at Fuery. His face were covered in dirt and his glasses were oblique.

"Will you be your guide, Fuery?" Roy asked.

"Yes sir!" Fuery said immediately and they started to climb up against the slope. It was hard and the wind with its cold breeze didn't help on the situation. From time to time they looked down and a chill ran over their spins.

Roy bit his under lip and sighed heavenly. _'This wouldn't have happened if we had just stayed down on the ground!'_ he thought.

**Flashback**

"Maybe we could go up there and take a look?" Roy said and looked up from the map.

Havoc went up to the colonel's side and looked down on the map and then at the minor mountain in front of them.

"Are you serious boos? I mean…" he sat his head aslant "…the way up…"

Roy raised an eyebrow at his lieutenant and the blond man sighed. "All right… I will pack our bags…Hey Fuery you have the other map right?"

"Yes sir? I have." Fuery answered confused. Havoc walked over the Fuery and together they went out to find a path up the minor mountain. Moments later Hawkeye walked up to the colonel.

"Something interesting? She asked and looked down the map. Roy pointed on the mountain.

"It's the only spot we haven't checked out. I know it's risky but…"

"If there is a possible chance that we find Edward by climbing this mountain then nothing is to risky in my eyes." She smiled to him like 'cheer up'.

But no one them had thought it throw. It's easier to climb up then down, and when they got up to the path… well.. they couldn't find your way down.

**Present**

Fuery, Havoc and Hawkeye were almost at the top. Roy was a little lower but not far. Fuery and Havoc pulled Hawkeye up on the top of the slope and they looked down at the colonel.

"Are we getting a little old down there sir?" Havoc teased with a little grin on his face. Roy looked up fast and gave him the evil eye.

"You just wait till I get up there…! Argh!" in a split second Roy lost his grip and fell several meters down the side, but caught a branch and were now floated in the thin air. Dirt, pain and embarrassment was written all over his face and he tried his best not to look down.

"Colonel Mustang!" yelled Hawkeye and was ready to jump but Havoc grabbed her.

"Are you all right sir?" Fuery yelled.

Roy looked into the slope and cursed for himself. He had decided not to look down. He took a deep breath and yelled back, " Yeah! I am okay! Just getting OLD!" Havoc and Fuery busted out laughing. Hawkeye sighed and shook her head.

Roy took another deep breath and for a split second he look down. He didn't believe his eyes when he saw something blue. Blue…? In a green forest with snow? '_No way'_ he thought. He glided down a little more down to get a closer look.

"Colonel!"

Roy ignored them. When he got closer enough to the ground after several minutes he jumped down to the ground. It's was hard and the little snow made it slippery. When he got closer he could see that it was military uniforms. He gasped and ran over to a group of men who lied on the ground. Most of them were covered in blood. He squatted on the side of the nearest and pushed a little to him. He was unconscious. Roy looked up with fear in his eyes. He stood up and walked around the five men. Suddenly a hand caught Roy's boot and held it to the ground.

"Sir…?" a weak voice sounded. Roy immediately sat down and took the soldiers hand.

"Sergeant!" Roy gasped. "What happened to you? An ambush?"

The soldier shook his head. "Nooo…" he mumbled. "There was… a woman."

"A woman did this?!" Roy looked around choked. The soldier nodded in a state of pain.

"There was one other… " another voice sounded. The soldier behind Roy was also awake. "There was two, but she did the most damage…" he coughed.

"Another one…?"

"Yeah… I couldn't believe my eyes… But it was him… sir…"

"Him..?"

"Yeah… It's was Full Metal, sir… He was with the woman but.." the other coughed.

"But what?!" Roy almost yelled.

"He didn't seem to… recognize us… nor your uniform… He looked like he could have kill us without a second thought…." The soldier gasped before passing out in Roy's arms. Moments later Havoc, Hawkeye and Fuery reached the confused colonel.

"Cononel Rot Mustang!" Hawkeye yelled. "That was without a doubt the worst thing you have ever done…! You could have been…" she stopped when she saw the soldiers around Roy. "what.. happened here…?"

Roy told them what the soldiers had told him. Havoc frowned.

"He.. attacked them?"

"I don't know.." Roy stood up, feeling a little uncertain.

Fuery had made contact to a larger group and requested back up. "Look on the bright sight colonel," Fuery said relaxed. "now we know that he is alive."

That was a bright side. The thought of Edward running his fingers though Roy's hair was… well, let's just say that he almost felt like coming.

"So what now boss?"

Roy needed seconds to answer. Then he nodded to himself and look at Havoc. "we continues up north."

"Sir? Is that wise? We are already close to the border?"

"hmm…" Roy mumbled '_The northern border… Drachman…. A country not to friendly with Amestris' _He looked up. "Guess we just have to be careful."

* * *

Not even 100 meters away stood Ciqin in all her might and glory and licked her weapons clean. Her golden fan had dried blood on it, and it didn't please her. She observed Roy and the others as they continued their mission with an eye worth an eagle.

"Those bastards…" she mumbled. "They are everywhere." She stood behind a huge tree, hiding and watched them get closer… '_Just a little more…_' she thought. She had quite a temper and it didn't help that the military made it hard for her to reach their headquarters.

"Stay where you are Eden…" she whispered in firm voice and looked up. In the trees crown, covered by leafs and branches sat Eden. He nodded and observed the group of blue uniforms move in their direction. In a few moments he would be able to smell them. The winds touched their faces but their eyes was focused on the blue uniforms like a hunter waiting for his prey.

"Mm…" nodded Eden back and placed his hand on his hip, ready to reach his weapon. He gasped. The pair gloves there used to be in is belt were gone. He panicking up in the tree and started up look around. He were on the edge of screaming. The only link to his past were those gloves. Suddenly he heard a voice down from the ground.

"Hey, boss. Look here." One of the blue uniforms bended over and took up one of the gloves. It was very dirty so he started to brush the dirt of. The uniform starred at it. "Colonel?" the man said and gave the glove to a dark haired man.

"My glove…? How in the world did it end up here? Oh my it's dirty."

'_His glove?'_ Eden became silent. He wasn't sure if had heard the voice before but non the less… It made him relax. He closed his eyes, and saw the man before him with a smile on his face. It left behind a feeling of something Eden never would be able to put into words… but it made him fell.. comfortable. "huh!" he gasped. Maybe this man knew something about his pasted?! He look down at Ciqin and saw that she was ready to attack. His glance changed from Ciqin and the blue uniforms. Was this a chance he dared to take?

He look down at himself. He suddenly felt like it missed something and the closer the raven man came, his body started to react like Eden never had felt before. He placed his hand over his heart and felt it's beat. He grind his teeth and began to breath more heavily. He bit his under lip and felt something were missing in his chest. He felt a longing for the man. _'Why? Who are you?'_

"Stop." A female voice said.

Eden looked down. A blond woman pointed a weapon against the crown he was sitting in. She has seen him. She couldn't see him, but she knew he was there.

"What is it lieutenant?" asked the raven man.

Eden sighed. His head was swinging with emotions and he wanted to scream.

"There is something up in the tree sir… I'm not sure what it is…"

Eden observed the raven haired man frowned.

"In that tree?" he asked and the woman nodded silent. The raven man began to walk closer to the tree and Eden didn't know what to do. He crawled further back in the tree, hoping the man didn't spot him. He was afraid. He couldn't attack this man. His eyes screamed fear and his whole body was stiff.

Eden looked down and saw him at the tree's foot, but in the next second he was gone.

"Argh!" he screamed and fell to the ground. In the second Eden had blinked with his eye Ciqin had knocked the man over. She held her golden fan in front of his throat. Ready to cut him up. The blade of the fan reflected in the light and everything in time seemed to have stopped.

"You there! Stop!" the blond man in uniform yelled as the woman pointed her weapon at Ciqin.

"You military skum!" Ciqin yelled in the raven face. "You shouldn't be here!"

"We.. are… arrhhh…!" the raven man tried to say as he struggled trying keeping the blade away from his throat. "looking for a man..!"

Ciqin grinned. "A man? Which crime did he commit?" she spitted the man under her in the face. "You are in the high lands mister! And a blue uniform is not welcome here. You should know that."

Havoc and Fuery wanted to interfere, but the raven hair man yelled; "stand back!"

"But colonel?!"

"Listen…!" the man said, "I'm looking after a man with blond hair and honey coloured eyes. He has a auto-mail arm and auto-mail leg, and disappeared about a year ago… His name was… Edward Elric… an state alchemist…!" Ciqin starred at him like he was a man who just came back from he the dead, but in that second... she let her guard down and the raven man collected all his powers and pushed Ciqin back and freed himself from her grip. He stood up, pointed a his hand with fingers ready to snap his fingers against her and yelled.

"HAVE YOU SEEN HIM?!"

**to be continued**

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***Phew* I kind of like this chapter.. don't know why ^^; , but hope you like it and enjoyed it =D see you soon 3**

**(sorry for the grammar mistakes) ;_;**


	5. The lost blood and the palms secret

**Hey everyone. Chapter 5 is up. This chapter was weird to write, because my little sister and her friend cosplayed in my Edward Elric and Roy Mustang outfits here the other day and now they are pretending to be Roy and Edward in the story… It's hard to see two girls at 13/14 year old girls as men and not laughed xD I have nothing against people who cosplay :3 but those two are just funny to watch.**

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"Answer me!" Roy shouted.

The wind made the only sound at the scene. Roy stood planted in the ground and watched his attacker in front of him on the ground. They glanced at each other and the air suddenly felt a lot warmer. She shocked her head.

"I would rather die then tell you where he is now!" she snapped "and throw him in the same reprehensible he was in when I found him!"

"What are you talking about?!" Roy snapped back. He was furious and her attitude didn't help. She stood up slowly and placed herself in a attack position. Ready to jump at Roy any second, made her think. _'Is he really looking for Eden…? __Eden… Edward… sounds kind of the same…_'

"This boy you just described. I found one looking like that about a year ago at the river bred."

Roy frowned.

"Was his name Edward Elric?"

"I don't know," she laughed.

"What's so funny?!"

Ciqin stopped her attack position and looked at Roy. "Because the boy I know… Don't even know his own name."

A sense of shock jumped into Roy's head.

"Why should we believe you?!" yelled Havoc, still frozen to his position by orders of Roy.

"You shouldn't," she grinned, "so all the military is here to find this boy of yours? A state alchemist?"

Roy's breath became deeper and faster. At last he looked into the ground and said in a loud whisper; "Tell me where he is…! NOW!"

"What's is your name?" she asked in a tried voice.

"Roy Mustang…!"

"Hmmm.. then you are not the one."

"What…! What are you talking about?!" Hawkeye asked. Since she knew of Edwards and Roy's relationship she founded it naturally to ask. She caught Roy's glance and could almost read in his eyes: _'don't'_

Ciqin looked at her golden fan and began to lick it.

"When he sleeps… he calls out something, but it does not sounds like 'Roy Mustang'. And… the possibility that he remembers you is pretty small, so there is no need for you to see him."

"What does it sound like..?!" Roy shouted.

"Like I would tell you!"

A fine breeze felt the scene with fresh air and a whisper sounded. "Colonel…?"

Everybody looked around. Ciqin looked towards the tree and was the only one who moved. Roy followed her movement, caught the glance of a pair of honing coloured eyes and a face he had longed for in such a long time. With a hand on the tree stood his young lover. Roy's knees fell to the ground and didn't blink.

"Edward…?"

The golden haired boy looked at the older, but suddenly felt something dragging in him.

"Wait!" shouted Roy.

Ciqin had caught the boy's arm and dragged him away from the scene with Roy, Havoc and Fuery running after them.

"Don't even try!" whispered Hawkeye to herself and aimed with her sniper.

A huge "BAUW!" sounded and Ciqin screamed. Hawkeye only got her shoulder, and said to herself; 'damn'.

"Edward! Stop!" Roy shouted after them and the boy tried many times to look back.

"Come on Eden!" Ciqin snapped. She was angry and questions popped into her head faster then she could answer them. _'Why?'_ she thought, as it ran through her head like a paper front page headline. She stopped and turned. _'If he is the one Eden miss… and I kill him… then Eden would never have remember…!' _She looked at Eden and smached her hand hard in his stomach. He fell unconscious to the ground. A few seconds later Roy and the others stood in front of her.

Blood fell down of Ciqin's shoulder and she was without a doubt in a great pain, but in her eyes Roy could clearly read: _'don't underestimate me'_ .

"Edward!"

'So he is the one the military wants…'

"Why did you do that?!" Havoc shouted aiming his gun at her. She did not answer nor blink. She was focused on Roy. The time itself seemed to had stopped.

"He is not… going back… with you…" Ciqin said in pain. She had been lucky. Hawkeye had aimed for her left shoulder when she used the right for combat. "I don't care if you are the 'colonel' he whispers about in the night…"

_'Whispers in his sleep? So a part of him do remember me?'_ Roy thought. He was prepared to start a fire if it became necessary. Ciqin eyes were also starting to burn. She stepped over the unconscious boy so he wouldn't take any damage. Nobody moved nor made a sound. Ciqin wrinkled her nose, ready to jump at Roy, but suddenly felt something holding her back. She look at her feet and saw the boy's hand holding her back.

"Eden..! Let go!"

Lying on the ground the boy shook his head and looked up. A face of stubbornness meet her eyes and yet again… She let her guard down. Hawkeye fired a shoot at her and hit her in her abdominal area. She fell the ground and cried in pain.

"You bastards…!"

Her hands pressed against her stomach. She suddenly gasped and remember Anthony's words: _'__You know…After Eden joined this group you have become more.. human. Just be careful that it wouldn't get in the way of the way you fight.' _How could she had been so stupid…! Still aiming at her Havoc and Fuery stood on either side of her and in the middle stood Hawkeye. Roy walked passed her and picked up the boy. He had lost his consciousness in the few seconds where Ciqin had taking the fall. Roy sat on squat and picked up his lover. He wanted to kiss him, but desisted to wait.

"I will take Edward with me now." Roy said in a very firm voice.

"You're making a big mistake…! He is looking for someone!"

"Then I will help him find this person."

Ciqin laughed a little and then started to cough up blood. "He will hate you… HATE YOU! Do you hear me?!"

"I wouldn't kill you.." Roy said in a sad voice. "You have watched out for him for a year… you have my thanks."

Roy and his group left Ciqin behind. Bleeding from her stomach and left to the gesture of death.

She looked up and watched them walk away. She slammed her hand in the ground and whispered to herself; "Just you wait…!"

* * *

'_Edward…'_ Roy thought. _'You are alive… you are in my arms again… memories or not… you are safe now.'_

They had returned to the northern headquarters some hours later. A cheer beyond anything hit the headquarters for many hours. Unfortunate the guest of honour was still asleep. Everyone was at the party. Everybody but one person. Roy sad been sitting by Edwards side in cause he woke up. He looked at the blond who was in a what seemed to be a deep sleep.

"Sir?"

Roy turned around and saw it was Hawkeye. He waved her in without saying anything. His glance returned to Edward. He folded his hands and wished that his lover soon would wake up. Hawkeye walked up to Roy.

"Any changes sir?"

"Nope."

"You should get something to eat sir…. Or maybe some sleep?"

Roy looked at his lieutenant. He knew that she wanted the best for him, but the only thing he wanted was to wait. She sighed and nodded.

"If you need anything sir…"

He smiled at her and she left the room. Behind sat Roy and could not do anything else then wait.

"Mmmm…"

'_What..?'_

The young alchemist in front of him was starting to wake up. Roy's mind stopped thinking. He placed his hands on the edge of the bed and watched Edward waking up. His young lover's honing eyes became visible.

"Mmmm…"

"Edward?" Roy almost whispered.

The boy opened his eyes slowly. Then they opened he looked over at the older man. He stood up and out of the bed and watched Roy from the other side. His breath became heavy and he looked around in the dark room.

"…Ciqin…?" Edward hissed in a low voice.

"The woman…?"

The boy nodded and Roy sighed. Now that he had Edward he didn't knew what to say to him. He look at his young lover, folded his arms and asked;

"Is it true that you have lost your memories and don't know who you are…?"

The boy nodded again and a tear fell down Roy's cheek. He covered his face in his palms and felt like crying his eyes out.

"I see…"

The young boy looked at the raven man. He didn't know what to do. He wanted to run, but something held him back. He frowned his eyebrows and took a closer look at the older mans gloves. He jumped on the bed and sat on front of the raven man. He took his hands and studied them very close.

"What is it?"

The boy looked up. "These… are… yours..?"

Roy nodded, "Yes, I'm the only one that has them. Why?"

The boy looked choked. Roy held his lovers hands in his. They looked each other in the eyes and for the second time that day the time seemed to have stopped. Roy hugged the young blond tight and the young one didn't resist.

"I know who you are…" Roy whispered. "It's maybe hard to believe… but your name is Edward Elric, also known as the Full Metal Alchemist…" Roy could fell the blond had started to breath more heavily and heard a whisper.

"Why… should I believe you…?"

"Because… in the past… you loved me…"

"What…?"

"My name is Roy… Roy Mustang… And I'm your lover…"

"You.. are the colonel…? The one in my dreams..?"

"I guess so…"

Edward looked at the colonel.

"Look…" Roy started. "Maybe your mind don't remember me… But… Maybe your body does…"

"My body…?"

"Yes…"

Roy leaned forward and kissed Edward gently on his lips. The soft feeling, the special taste of Edward, all of Roy's feeling towards the boy almost jumped out of him like the flowers in the early spring. He leaned back again and looked in Edwards eyes.

"How was it..?" Roy asked a little uncertain. The boy just looked at him. There was a complete silence in the room. Edward leaned a little forward and gave Roy a little kiss. A simple little touch and then sat back on the bed. He looked into his palms and sighed.

"It was… good.. I guess…" the boy grinned his teeth and smashed his hands in his face and screamd; "Argh..!"

"Edward! What is wrong?"

"Why..?" Edward started. "It felt so right… I enjoyed it… but.. I'm so confused!" Roy held his lover tight.

"It's okay. I didn't mean the hurt you."

Edward looked up. "Then... you don't mind kissing me again…?"

"What?"

"Kiss me…? Please…"

Roy couldn't hesitate and locked his lips together with Edward. Both of them moaned a little as their tongues started to dance. They broke apart few moments later to catch their breath.

"How do you… feel?" Roy asked nervous.

Edward smiled at him and folded his arms around the raven mans neck.

"I still don't remember who you are.. but… for the first time… in a long time… my body… my mind… feels.. complete…"

Edward leaned forward and placed himself on Roy's lap. He started to kiss the older man and Roy greeted him. Never again was he going to leave Edward. Time would heal their wounds.

"I love you.. Edward…"

Roy placed his hand under Edwards shirt and started to touch Edward all over his chest.

"Let your body remember me… If you trust your body.. then you know I wouldn't hurt you…"

Edward gasped in Roy's mouth when the older man started to play with one of his nipples. They needed this. Both of them. The moans, the pleasure, the acknowledgment of their feelings. In those moments they were free, but unknown with a power far greater then any of them had ever known.

_To be continued… _

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**Now I'm not evil anymore right? ;_; The next chapter will first come later… SRY! I have a school show to make and I 'm afraid that it will take all of my time these next couple of days… But I hope you liked the chapter =D leave a comment and tell me what you think 3**

**TheYukiii~**


	6. I see the speechless fear in your eyes

**Author's notes:**** I would like to dedicate this chapter to the idiot who had deleted my teams AMV to use for our annual school show here Friday. ****Without him / her, I had not sat for 18 (rigid) hours in front of a PC to find audio files, etc. But okay ... otherwise I had not been written the next chapter here so quickly.****You just can't win here in this world" (This joke properly sounds better in Danish, ****but one should not just give up so easily (like I did…). ****Let us do our best guys! =D ~ Enjoy.**

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When you know the feeling of being so far down that you could not only reach the bottom, but also the kiss it, the darkness comes automatically. The only thing you can hope for is that a hand reach out to you. And when your hand finally reaches an other and you take it, the feeling is indescribable in all the languages of the world.

When dreams become reality, the light slowly begins to return and the sun suddenly becomes clearer. Its heat can be clearly perceived again and you feel suddenly more alive.

It was a spring morning in Centrale City and sun beams hit Roy Mustang in his face as he looked out the window. He had just drawn curtains and looked down at the narrow street he had prospect from his apartment.

Children played with each other, while mothers did their daily shopping and a few old men sat at a sidewalk cafe and played chess. Roy smiled to himself, took a deep breath and enjoyed the fresh air to the full. Now spring had finally arrived. The cold winter was tucked away with the birds on the roofs of the houses was like that last year had not taken place.

He dressed a new cotton shirt and boxers, turned his head and looked over his shoulder toward his bed. Calm and peaceful was a blond man in early twenties. In his bed was his lover and slept like an angel. He must have enjoyed the warm bed and his surroundings.

Roy turned the rest of his body and went and lay down on the bed beside his love. He stroked his fingers through the young man's hair. A tear fell down his cheek while he was observing the other's breathing. It had been the first night where he had slept through (without waking up from nightmares) since they had arrived back to Central City a couple of months ago.

It was now gone around. five months ago they had found Edward. Already from the beginning Edward kept mostly to Roy. After their reunion had Roy explains how the world was, and that none other than his lieutenant knew about their relationship. Why it was a secret was because they both were still in the military. Roy explained to Edward that he had a brother who had been at least as crushed as his own, but the sight of Edward probably could do well again.

In the train from the North to Centrale City had Edward even asked if his brother maybe hated him for what he had done. To disappear in this way. He could not really use his memory loss for something he thought. Roy had not said anything about it. He had just put his arm around the young alchemist and kissed him gently in his hair.

Roy had not told Edward that he had been raped the day he disappeared. Nor that he tried to commit suicide. All this may come with time, and now was the time, fortunately on their side.

After Edward was awake Roy had been grilled about his relationship with Edward. Roy had assured them that their relationship was extremely professional, but he felt that some of the blame was his. Roy was, after all, responsible for the mission a year ago, who was to blame for the current situation.

Roy was now on the task of persuading the young alchemist on his feet again. After they had come to Centrale City was Edward through several doctors and psychologists than most people can meet throughout their lives. They all came up together to the same conclusion. That Edward had memory loss and without distance to perform tasks for the military. Therefore, both Edward and Roy put on leave in the hope that something could get Edwards back memory. Roy went to work but now and then although he was officially on leave. Not to get away from Edward, but to give him space.

Only about a week after Edward had arrived ten Central City, he met his younger brother. Alphonse had thrown himself into his brother's arms. The youngest knew that his older brother could not be him, but merely that he was alive, his eyes filled with tears of joy of unknown dimensions.

"Nii-san ... I'm so glad that you are back ...!"

Edward nodded briefly, closed his eyes and whispered in his brother's ear, "I'm sorry I left you ... I'm home now ..."

Alphonse wiped his tears away and said quietly with a smile, "welcome home ..."

Roy seemed even that Edward had done well sitting with his younger brother. It was held at the hospital, Edward had been hospitalised. After the reunification, however, Edward had broked down in tears. The whole night at the hospital had Roy tried to comfort his love, and it leaved him a scar in his heart every time Edward claimed that it was his own fault.

After being discharged, it was decided that Edward should move in with Roy. Sow the older alchemist better could keep an eye on Edward. Still no one had suspected that something was going on between Roy and Edward, and as the days began to go Edward also started progressively to be more relaxed about Roy. Each morning, gave Edward a morning kiss on the cheek, while on the evening Roy gave his love a goodnight kiss on the forehead. Besides these two kisses in the day the couple did not tough each other through the day and it was seldom that Edward said anything. Instead he used his time reading books.

Roy knew that Edward could not help it, but since they had retruned to Centrale City was Edward started calling Roy for, Mr. Mustang. It made him sad, but thought that it is just a period.

They slept in their own rooms, but it often happened that Roy slept by Edwards side because of nightmares. Often he cried Ciqins name in his sleep as if he called his mother. Roy could not blame him. The woman had been like a mother to him.

Sometimes wondered Roy why Edward so volunteers had gone back to return to Centrale City. Two months after Edward had moved in with Roy, Roy had collected the courage to ask him. An afternoon where they had lit in the fireplace and Edward was on the floor and read a book. Roy stepped into the heated room and sat down beside his love on the floor. He took a deep breath and asked why he had been withdrawn. To the question Edward had looked at him and in a few seconds and then just smiled and replied:

"It felt great to be in your presence, I believe ...."

"My presence?"

Edward nodded, closed the book and sat up against Roy. He took Roy's hand and started massaging it gently.

"You can not see it?" Edward had asked.

Roy shook his head. Edward just smiled and Roy looked deeply into my eyes.

"The way you are by my side when there is nothing to gain by it ..."

Roy sat speechless. He could not shape a phrase in his head. He mumbled a little and felt very ... bright. Edward let go of Roy's hand and grinned a little. Roy sat and stared at Edwards reaction. It was the first time since the mission that Edward had laughed.

"What is so funny?" asked Roy with a confusion in his voice.

Edward stopped to laugh and leaned forward. As a tiger hunt he approached Roy, placed his one hand on his thigh and the other on his cheek. A little kiss hit Roy's lips and everything about Roy stopped. Roy closed his eyes and enjoy the little moments. After kissing Edward raised himself up, took a step back and bowed deeply.

"Excuse me Mr. Mustang! I should not have done that...! "

"Wait!"

Edward turned and it was clear that he would run out of room, but Roy was faster. He got hold of the blonde one leg, which resulted in Edward took the floor.

"Sorry!" Roy gasped and crawled up to Edward and sat down beside him. "Are you okay?"

"No," Edward screamed. "I do not know who I am, who you are or who have some! It eats me up inside! Leave me alone ... I beg you ... "

Roy let go of Edward and the young alchemist ran up to his room and slammed the door. Roy sat back and could clearly hear his love cry behind a locked door. He shook his head, stood up and walked toward the fireplace. On the way over Roy came to the book as Edward had lain and read in.

"Whoa ..."

He bent down and took the book up. When he opened it a small piece of paper dropped out. Roy picked it up and looked at it.

"Date… page ..." he muttered. _'So writes Edward page numbers down instead of a bookmark ...?' _He thought. He looked at the bottom of the label and says: _'Page 217th'_ He opened the book and looked at the page. He sat on the floor and began to read it into his head.

_'The teacher came into the classroom and it was quiet. She was wearing her usual white shirt and black skirt that went to the knee. She put her bag on the table and said hello with a gentle voice to the class. Then she took a chalk and started writing up something on the blackboard. Suddenly she could hear her students whispering in the background. She turned and asked, with her always polite tone of what they whispered about. A girl replied, "The red ribbon you have in your hair miss ..." _

_"Oh, this ..." said the teacher, and tagged it in her hair. "I got it from a person whom I met long ago and he asked me to watch it. He gave it to me so I could remember him. " _

_One of the students raised his hand up. _

_"Yes?" _

_"We saw an old picture of you at the party last week miss ... with a man and a bow. He had his arm around you. " _

_The teacher just smiled. "A man?" She asked. Her smile got the students to giggle. The students nodded. "Yes, but his face was blurred ... We believe that it is because it was old. Was it their boyfriend in the picture, Miss? " _

_"My boyfriend ...?" _

_Several students nodded. "Yes, Miss?" _

_Teacher hid her face in her hands and began to cry. "I ... I can not remember him ...! I can not even his face ... " she sobbed. "I loved him so much ... And now… I can not remember how he looked!" '__  
_  
Roy slammed the book, got up and ran to Edward's door.

"Edward! Open the door! "

"No! Just leave me be! "

Roy struck at the door and then fell together in front of it. His forehead pressed against the door and prayed that Edward would open the door.

"Edward ... I beg you ..."

Sounds started coming from the door lock and it opened. Roy looked up, and so his love with red eyes and other obvious signs that he had been crying. Roy stood up and took the young alchemist in his arms.

"Thank you ..." whispered Roy. "... Because you opened the door ..."

"Mr. Mustang ..? "

"Yes ...?"

"Why .. did you want me... to open the door ...? "

Roy placed his hands on Edward's shoulders and looked deeply into his eyes. Roy could read the fear just by having his hands on Edward's shoulders.

"Do not be afraid of me Edward. I would never hurt you ..."he sihed "... I read your book ... on page 217 about the teacher and the ribbon ... "

Edward pushed himself out of Roy's arms.

"Now you will probably also say that books will make me crazy?! Like the doctors?! They say that if I read, I could get a..! "

"No, Edward ... I will not ..."

"What .. will you .. so ...? "

"I want you to be safe. That you feel comfortable ... and if you can not find the rest here ... we could try and you lived with your brother ...? "

"You think I'm afraid for you ... do not you ...?" Said Edward in a sobbing tone.

"Yes ... unfortunately ... I just have make some calls."

Roy felt in some way resolved. He only wanted the best for Edward. He picked up the phone book, lifted up the phone and began to enter a number.

"Stop ..." whispered a voice behind him.

Roy ignored it and continued to enter the number.

"Stop!" Cried Edward.

Roy slammed down the phone and turned to Edward.

"Why?! You do not feel safe here Edward..! And if you must have a fair chance to remember who you are, you must first and foremost be safe! "

Roy threw the phone book into a corner of the room and sat down on the floor. He felt frustrated and had just wanted to disappear. He looked over at Edward and sighed.

"It's not working Edward ... Maybe ..."

He hated himself for thinking the thought, but perhaps it would be best to Edward came out to Alphonse in some time. He sighed again and looked down at the floor. He did not even notice that Edward was sitting in front of him. Edward again took Roy's hand and looked into it.

"It's not because I am not comfortable with you ..." he started nervously. "I'm afraid to... that I might... start hating you ..."

Roy opened his eyes and looked up.

"Hate me ...? How ...? "

Edward took some quick, deep breaths. Then he looked up at Roy's eyes.

"You give me everything! And I .. I give nothing back! It is not a balanced exchange ..!" A silence fell over the room. The two men looked each other deep in your eyes. "I believe .. I unconsciously miss what my body think… we had together..." He sobbed "It's… like a prison… Mr. Mustang..! Please... drag me out...?"

Roy took Edward's hand and kissed it gently.

"Edward ... say my name ..."

"Mr. Mustang ...? "

"No ... my first name."

Edward hesitated, but eventually, "Roy ...?"

Roy sat in tears. He wiped tears away and looked at Edward who was at least as ready to cry. He smiled, however, shortly afterwards.

"Roy ...?"

"Edward ...?"

"May .. may I kiss you ...?

Roy nodded. "Everything you want Edward. I belong only to you .. "

Edward collected his courage, leaned forward, swung his arm around Roy's neck and pulled the older man closer. Their lips met in a wet and long kiss. This kiss was far beyond anything they had ever shared before. Roy took the risk and pushed his tongue into Edward's mouth. To his surprise, Edward allowed it and their kiss continued. Several seconds later, however, they had to pause and to breathe.

"I love you ... Edward ..." panted Roy, in an attempt to confirm his feelings for the blonde man. He hadn't hoped to get a kind of answer.

"Roy ... I .. love you too... " Edward whispered back.

Roy looked deep into Edward's eyes. The fear was gone. He felt relieved. He kissed Edward easy on the mouth, along his jaw and down his throat.

"Mmmm ..." Edward groaned a little and leaned back. Roy enjoy the sight of his love, and smiled. The very room seemed to have been less in those few minutes had elapsed. The raven man opened his shirt and took it off. He began to open Edward's shirt as he kissed with all his pleasure. Roy felt quite like falling in love all over again and began to lick Edward's nipple. The young man groaned and let himself be consumed by a feeling and a voice inside of him who said it was fine. Roy stopped a brief second and put his head on Edward's chest. The blonde fingers began to stroke through the raven man's hair as he enjoy it to the fullest. Roy listened to Edward's heartbeat and followed its rhythm.

"Edward ...?"

"Uhn ..?"

"I will not hurt you in any way, so .. if you do not like it do not hesitate to tell. Because ... I can not stop myself now ... "

Edward kissed Roy's hair and nodded. "I don't want you to stop... Roy…"

To be continued.

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**Hey again. ****I hope you enjoy this chapter ~ thanks for the lovely reviews / Alarms & favourites. ****It warms my heart =D**

**And I hope that the grammar has improved since the last chapter ^ ^;**

**TheYukii ~**


	7. A kiss and the place where love dwells

_**Author's note:**_

"**I should sleep. But 'should' is dead. 'Should' commit double suicide with 'usual'. It was a rather tragic love story, where they jumped from a waterfall together. They hoped that love would give them wings and that they could fly to eternity."**

…**I really need a life sometimes… or maybe just sleep ~ XD! Enjoy! 3**

* * *

_(From last chapter of; What echoes in eternity;) _

'_Edward kissed Roy's hair and nodded. "I don't want you to stop... Roy…"'_

* * *

With an observation as a leopard Roy admired his prey. The actual hunt was over and it had completely surrendered to his mercy. Only their breaths could be heard and as, like a true hunter Roy admired his prey first before eating it. He began quietly to undress Edward as their kisses became more violent. He could feel how his desire grew in line with that Edward became more and more naked. He started touching his thighs. Afterwards, he began to lick Edward's chest, along the edge of his auto mail arm. About his scars were particularly sensitive Roy didn't know, but he quickly found out that Edward groaned more when he hit one. The sweat was beginning to show itselves while their breathing was deeper and longer. Edward laid his hand in front of his mouth to dampen his moaning sounds.

"Edward ... Let me hear you ..."

"Noo.. it's embarrassing ..."

Roy shook his head. "Embarrassing? No, Edward. I very enjoy hearing you. All of your sounds ... let me hear them. "He said, tough on Edward's erection.

"Ahn!"

"Yeah… just like that ..."

With few strokes Edward was hard and Roy helped him with the rest of his clothes. Roy bent over Edward again and began licking his erection.

"Uhn ... mmm ... Mr. ... Uh ... Roy ..."

Edwards's body could not keep up with all the feelings that overwhelmed him, while Roy's mood had risen indescribable. His mouth licked Edward's erection. Then he began to undress himself. It could not go fast enough. Roy could feel how fast his patience rapidly declined. When he was undressed and sat down on the floor, and he threw his clothes into the corner. Seconds later he was taken over by an astronomical shock wave of unknown dimensions. He swallowed his saliva and looked down.

"Edward ..."

Roy swung his head back and panted heavily. Edward had taken the older man's erection in his mouth and had started using his tongue. He played with it for Roy's great satisfaction.

"Edward ... You do not ... if you do not want ..."

Edward did not answer. He just kept caressing Roy, who's groaning lauder was higher then ever. Roy couldn't take it any longer. He pulled Edward away from his erection and covered the young boy's wet mouth with his own, straining against the painful desire to come on the spot. He pushed Edward against the wall and jammed himself against his body. Saliva dribbled from the corner of Edward's mouth and ran down his chin. Roy greedily licked it off with his hot tongue. Suddenly, without warning Edward came. _'What…?'_ the older man thought. Roy had only toughed Edward's erection… what… two times?

"Roy…" Edward moaned, clinging to Roy, grasping his arms. Roy grabbed Edward's hands and held them tight. A trail of semen stained his stomach and continued down his legs, but Roy wasn't complaining. Edward started to lick it away, making Roy almost howl. He grabbed his older lover and looked at him with eyes filled with lust. Roy kissed Edward, and asked what he wanted.

"Take me," Edward begged. "Please…Take me."

Roy was stunned and looking at his younger lover with surprising eyes. Edward didn't care if Roy was only doing him a favour. If this only was a scene to help him recover his memories again. He didn't care. He wanted Roy more than anything else in the world.

Roy himself wanted the same thing, but was still too scared to find out if the feeling was mutual. In his mind he remembered the first time he had thrusted inside his young lover and how their moans had created music. How strange they had looked at each other the next day, how much Edward had, asked Roy to forget that, they had just had sex for the first time, and how difficult it had been not to laugh at Edward, who could hardly walk because of soreness. Looking at Edward now, standing close enough to feel his breath, Roy was unable to cry out his lover's name.

As Edward nipped at Roy's neck, he could feel his heartbeat. _'I need to do this'_ he thought, and he fastened his lips to the skin like he was a vampire sucking blood. His body trembled with fear and confusion.

"Edward!" Roy gasped, scooping Edward up in his arms. Edward wrapped his legs around his waist, clinging to Roy like a child.

"Edward!" Roy gasped again. His rough voice set Edward's lust in fire. Edward had just ejaculated minutes ago, but feeling Roy's erection against his made his erection stand up again.

Roy carried Edward up the stairs, down the hall and into his bedroom and kicked the door open. Then he threw his young lover on the bed like a piece of luggage. The sudden pain made Edward howl a little, but it quickly turned into a sweet throbbing as Roy loomed over him.

"R… Roy…?" Edward said, looking straight into his eyes.

"I've been wanting you all this time" Roy whispered, nibbling Edward's earlobe. He felt Edward's hot tongue on the nape of his neck. "Edward…" Roy moaned, as he played with the younger ones hair. Suddenly he stopped and gave him a smouldering look. "Am I… is this what you really want…? I know it's very late to say this, but… We don't have to do this.. if you feel uncomfortable about it." he asked bluntly.

"It's true that I'm scared… but…" Edward hesitated. Roy looked into Edward's wistful eyes and realized how much courage Edward might have gathered to say it.

"So you want this?"

"Yes. Oh yes," Edward gasped, his hips shuddering. _'Please don't stop…' _Edward thought wildly.

Truth be told, they had both felt too intimidated to make the first move. As they moaned each other's names over and over, their erections grew even harder. Edward caressed Roy's bare buttocks for a moment, and then grabbed his swollen cock.

"Hey!" Roy yelled, but he wasn't objecting. Edward massaged the sensitive tip of Roy's member with his thump as Roy circled inside Edward's entrance with two fingers. Roy frowned his brows and clenched his teeth, trying to hold back.

'_He seems to like it… but… why do I feel like this…?' _the thoughts ran into Edward's head. _'I… can't control myself…!' _Suddenly Edward kneeled on the bed, raised his bottom, still with Roy inside of him. His body knew what it wanted.

"Hurry" Enter me!" he begged, his bottom undulating with desire. "I want you… so much… Roy…!" Roy grabbed Edward's thighs. Lifted them up, and shoved his erection into him.

"Ahh!" Edward cried out, finally feeling that longed-for sensation. His hole pulsed greedily, trying to shallow Roy up.

"Nhm… Uhnnn… Ahhh…" Roy panted, driving his member into Edward's depths. Edward's hips shook in a kind of sweet agony. Roy's member kept on exploring, burying itself deeper and deeper as Edward screamed and groaned.

"Roy," he moaned. "Don't stop, don't stop…" Just then Edward felt something erupt inside him.

"Sorry!" Roy gasped with embarrassment, but Edward just grinned. His anus muscles clamped around Roy's drooping member, like they were sad to let him go. All of a sudden, the member came back to life.

"You really are my Edward…" Roy whispered with a tear in his eye. Edward could see himself reflecting in Roy's eyes.

"Roy… I…" but before Edward could finish the sentence, Roy's member him began thrusting again inside, setting his flesh on fire. As Roy penetrated him deeply, Edward felt his eyes with tears. Roy had unveiled the depths of his heart, making his desire bubble over. He wanted to quiver with the pleasure all night… and forever.

"Ahhh… haaa. Haaa…!" Edward moaned, moving his hips gently from side to side. He reached his arms back to Roy as if to say: '_Taste me. Tough me. Never let me go.' _Suddenly Roy tensed all over.

"Roy!" Edward screamed, as Roy filled him a second time. Han was panting so hard, he felt about to faint. Roy pulled out of Edward and turned Edward on his back.

"Edward…" Roy whispered, darting his tongue inside his mouth. Their hot tongues danced together for a while, until they finally came up for air. "I love you…"

"I… love you too…"

They went to sleep in each other's arms. The next day Roy was first up. He look to his side and saw his blond lover, peacefully asleep. _'See? This is how much I want you…' _he thought as he stroked his fingers though the blonde's hair. _'shoot, what time is it?" _Roy looked at the clock at the end of his bed. _'Only 8 pm… phew.. I don't know what we had done if it was later…' _He got up, looking back a the blond and smiled. He decided to let Edward sleep and went downstairs naked.

He took a blanket from the chair in the room and swung it on his hips. There was still a little fire in the fireplace, sow he decided to turn it on again. A little heat would not hurt. After the fire was lit he took a glass of water, drank it and put the glass on the table in front of him. The whole world was in his head, and he seemed that he couldn't not find the peace to think one thought. Suddenly someone hugged him from behind. A shock went through his body because one of the arms was cold and metallic while the other was of flesh and blood. A quiet _'apology'_ came from behind his back, but he just smiled, then turned around and kissed his blond lover. Their kiss lasted a long time. Roy thought that his love was red in the head as their lips parted. He assembled their foreheads to mark after a possible fever, but there was nothing. Edward was naked and should be more cold than to have heatstroke.

"You are quite red in your own head," whispered Roy with a whisper, only leaving his beloved hear. "Do you feel bad or something?"

Edward shook his head and turned his gaze down. He bit a little in his underlip, but pulled himself together and looked into Roy's eyes.

" It ...I ... "

The words would not come out in an order which would make any sense. Roy hugged the blonde man, kissed him lightly on the head also at the mouth.

"If you do not feel like it, we don't need to do it ever again."

No! "Edward gasped and looked almost panicking into Roy's eyes. "It must not stop ... Roy ... I ..."

"Huh?" Roy gasped, as Edward wrapped his arm around his neck. With enough force that it was almost painful, Edward firmly grabbed Roy's chin and kissed him. An intense, insatiable, unrelenting kiss.

"Never .. stop .. please ... "Edward panted. Roy could already feel that Edward was becoming hard again. He lifted Edward up on the table while he kept kissing him all over his face. He placed his hand between Edward's legs and the young alchemist groaned.

"Uh ... Roy ..."

"How sweet you are… Edward ..." He placed a hand on Edward's erection, and leaned forward, making Edward gasp into his ear. But suddenly… A high knock sounded from Roy's main door.

_To be continued._

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_**Author's notes: **_

**"Gift" in Danish, can mean both 'to get married' or 'take poison'. As in Danish you can joke with "gift" is both something you can be, or something you can take. Good luck with the Danish language! **

**_I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Thank you for the wonderful reviews / alarms & favourites. It warms my heart =D_**

**_TheYukii ~_**


	8. I opened my eyes only to see darkness

_****_

Author's note:

**Flat plates vs. deep plates: **

**The night between Wednesday and Thursday I sat with one of my team mates and tried to get some sound stuff to work, and out of the blue he asks me about 'why you are using flat plates ... the deep plates can be seen throughout the course, such ..'. now it's Sunday ... and I still thinking about it! I feel faint ... very weak ... XD!**

* * *

"Huh?" Came from both men. They sent each other urgent glances, while Edward jumped down from the table and ran upstairs. Roy hurried to take on a pair of trousers and opened the door.

"Yes, who is it?"

A soldier with the same coal black hair as Roy, a jaw beyond all dimensions and compound eyes stared at Roy.

"Colonel Mustang?" He asked.

"Yes?" Said Roy, looking at his door. His name plate was still there.

"Please contact General Jones and meet him at his office within the next hour. It is important. "Said the soldier, and gave Roy a piece of paper in his hand. He saluted to Roy, who reciprocated. The colonel closed his front door and looked at the paper. _'It was late for a meeting ...'_ Roy thought and heard small sounds coming from above.

"It is okay Edward. It was just a messenger. "

The blonde man came quietly cutting down the stairs, wearing only a blanket and he looked at Roy.

"What is it?"

"... A call for a meeting with General Jones ... sigh ..." said Roy while he studied the paper.

"Must come I too?"

Roy shook his head. "No, otherwise he would have told me to bring you... I will unfortunately have to leave you for few hours Edward." The young alchemist sighed, but then he nodded.

"Hurry back okay?" Edward said a bit nervously. Roy looked at the young alchemist and smiled, hugged him and kissed his hair.

"Not even a whole army could keep me away from you ..."

After that Roy hurried himself in the bath, switched to his uniform, gave Edward a little kiss on the mouth and he went out through the door. Edward stood back, for the first time alone in Roy's house. After some minutes he decided to go to the bathroom himself. However, he didn't want to wash Roy's scent of him when he finally had found peace. He began to think back. Think of Roy's sweat dripping body, on how he called out after him and how Edward had felled at home in his arms. He turned on the water and tore the curtain fall. He tied her hair up and sat on the toilet seat. He looked at the water as quietly gathered in the bathtub. Quietly, he let his thoughts to calm observed came up in the bath, but a thrill meeting him. The water was icy cold.

"Huh?" A repressed memory crushed into his soul. A feeling of being trapped in ice cold water, he was quick to get out of the tub again. He collapsed on the bathroom floor with Roy's crying voice in his mind.

"Roy ...?" He swung his head back and felt a sudden pain between his legs. He began to feel dirty. Not physically, but mentally, but why? He crawled back to the bathtub and put a hand into the water. Still ice cold. He raised himself up and then down into the water. His owned mirror startled him on his way up. He hurried to pull the cork out of the tub, stood up, but then caught his face expressed in the mirror.

"What ...?" He whispered in fear. His face showed a sorrow that he had not felt for along time. But if he felt it or not, was evident in his eyes. He could not take it. He clenched his left hand and swung the whole arm into the mirror. In the same second vanished light throughout the house.

"Argh!" He screamed in pain as blood began to appear from his knuckles. No matter where he turned his glance he saw Roy's face in sharp pain. The temperature was drastic falling, and Edward felt as if he had a heat stroke. He sat down on the floor, panting and his legs bent up to his chest.

"Roy ...?" He whispered quietly in an attempt to reassure himself, which failed. The blood had started from his hand had started to pour down his leg, the pain was increasing and the only sound that was present was a mixture of water that ran and Edward's breathing. The sound of the water around him, made him very insecure and he felt afraid, as unable to move him.

Edward had no idea how long he had sat there, but suddenly he could hear the door opening and closing again fast. Someone was climbing the stairs, but Edward could not move. His eyes were like glass, which were focused down on the floor. One person was standing outside the door to the bathroom and tried to open it.

"Edward ...?" Came from the outside. "Are you in there ...?"

The blond man looked up slightly, but said nothing. Without thinking about it was the view apparently come back.

"Edward?"

The voice was familiar. It was Roy's. Edward closed his eyes, collapsed on the floor and dozed away.

* * *

"Edward!" Roy screamed. Edward opened his eyes and looked up at Roy. He stood on a riverbank and could see himself in a boat. The blonde alchemist walked over and stood beside Roy. "Edward! Catch the rope! "

The young alchemist turned his eyes to his alter ego who (surprisingly?) was in a boat. He looked awful out in the cold wind in your hair which covered most of his face he looked just on the rope.

"Pick it up Full metal!" People yelled around him. "You can do it!"

But he did not move.

_'Why ... I could collect it up ...?'_ Speculated Edward.

"Edward! Please! "Roy yelled and he current became more powerful by the second. The Edward in the boot took the rope, kissed it and throw it back in the water.

'_What ...? But Roy ...?'_ He saw himself lip-read to Roy and heard his promises yelling for him.

"Edward! do not! " The young Alchemist leaned himself backwards and fell into the strong river. The water absorbed him the second he touched the surface. "Edward! NO! "

From the sidelines Edward could see Roy battled out in the river, but some soldiers have caught him so he did not reach that far.

"Let go!" He ordered even though he knew that it was suicidal. Edward saw how Roy gasp for breath like a newborn baby who had just arrived in the world.

_'Did I really ... given him so much pain ...?'_" After the idea was conceived, could Edward not forget it. Everything suddenly became dark.

"Edward ... Edward ..." was his name called several times and it grew darker and darker. A whisper came from the subsoil became stronger and stronger and finally Edward almost taste it.

"EDEN!"

* * *

Edward's eyes jumped while he screamed a scream that almost could shatter glass. He looked around and could see that he was no longer in the bathroom, but in Roy's bedroom. A quick glance down by himself confirmed that he had clothes on. Of pure uncertainty and desperation he fall off the bed, onto the floor and tried in vain to get up and stand. Moments later the door sprang open and Roy rushed in.

"Edward .." Roy hugged his lover close to him. In a few more minutes with Edward continued to scream into Roy's chest.

"Shh ..." Roy reassured. Although night had Edward not screamed so much, but Roy was no doubt that he had had a nightmare. Finally Edward stopped screaming. He noted a kind of foreboding in Roy's eyes and began to shake his head.

"Edward ... what happened out in the bathroom?"

The young alchemist pushed by Roy's embrace and sat up on the edge of the bed.

"... I had a flashback ... I think ..." muttered Edward. His blond hair concealed most of his face.

Roy sat up next to Edward and asked: "About what, however? Do you remember anything? "

Edward hesitated, adrenaline rushing around his body, and he felt suddenly not very sure of anything.

"Roy ...?"

"Yes?"

"How did I disappear?"

"How you disappeared ...?"

Edward nodded his head restlessly. If the flashback had told the truth, had Edward wanted suicide. He looked at Roy with certain eyes and bit his lower lip.

"You ...?" Roy was very difficult to answer. Edward had really taken him by surprise with that question. He took Edward's hand and was about to say something when Edward interrupted him.

"I tried to drown myself ...?"

The time had suddenly stop.

"I'm sorry ..." Roy sobbed. His voice sounded so far away. Edward closed his eyes and listened to the odd rhythm of Roy's breath. He took several shallow breath, but his heartbeat showed no sign of slowing down.

"... Why would I commit suicide?"

Roy embraced Edward, with a close grip as they came closer. "Edward ..." Roy began to explain about the mission they were assigned. About Edward's rape and the subsequent scene with the boat when Edward attempted to commit suicide, as Roy was happy not succeeded.

Meanwhile, Roy was telling, Edward was completely quiet while scenes and memories started sprouted up in his mind. The trip on the way up there where they made loved in the train, the found of Roy's gloves in their cabin as Edward might have hidden in his pocket, the rape, the pain and the subsequent guilt of seeing Roy's face, the killers in the boat and finally ... the suicide attempt. When Roy was done, he let go of Edward whose whole body was shaking.

"Roy ...?" Edward said quickly.

"Yes?"

"I want to be alone ...." Edward shot back.

Roy nodded and stood up. "Call me if there is anything..." But Edward was silent. After Roy had closed the door, he took the nearest pillow and began to scream into it. He felt duped by Roy that he had lied to him, not telling him the truth. His tears would seem to have no end.

Outside the door was Roy himself started to cry. Sobbing, he went down the hall and could not do anything but wait. He sat in a chair, staring into the fireplace fire without feeling the heat as it usually gave.

He felt powerless, emotionally naked, while unable to understand how it could go so wrong in so little time.

'_How…?' _

He found a bottle of brandy and sat down on the floor in front of the living fireplace. He took a swig directly from the bottle and cut face when the bitter taste began. He had quite forgotten the taste of strong alcohol. His eyes looked into the long room, with paintings on the walls all stared at him. He could almost hear them if about him, even though the only realistic sound came from the fireplace. Roy could imagine Edward's pain and that alone gave him cuts in his heart. Why had he not told him long ago...? He had known that one day it would come, but it also looked just would be today of all days. He sighed and took another swig from the bottle with the golden drops. Golden… golden ... as in Edward's hair and eyes. Surprisingly Roy suddenly heard a sound of running water up from the bathroom. _'So Edward would take a shower anyway ...?' _Roy looked at his watch. _'It is past midnight ...'_ he thought sensible. Roy decided to go up to Edward and talk to him. Being alone would not be the best solution. He knew that he had destroyed Edward's confidence in him by not telling him the truth.

With heavy steps he walked upstairs to bathroom, but suddenly walked into something wet. He looked down and his sight shocked him in that his whole hallway was flooded. He turned his gaze toward the bathroom door and ran to it. He tore open the door and saw his loved Edward with a razor blade in his hand ... ready at his wrist ...

"Edward?!"

_to be c__ontinued. _

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**I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Thank you for the wonderful reviews / alarms & favourites. It warms my heart =D**

**I know that I've said this before, but this time I mean it. ****Now it will probably take some time before the next chapter comes out. ****Reason? school and regular work. hope you understand.**

**TheYukii ~**


	9. Let's share hell if that is your wish

Author's notes:

Here the other day I promised my little sister two help here with her Danish paper. A mistake I will never commit again. Since she is a fan of the Twilight books she had been charged (along with her group) to compare the first of the books with the first of the films.

To make it nice, we had arranged a variety of Girlie evening. While the movie was on, I could sleep, but no. They dotted all the time and forced me to see the first hour. I suddenly excl aims "There are some who have turned off the laughing gas in this movie ..."

After that they kicked me out of the room ... Success!

* * *

_He had always had a special kind of temperament. He did not know exactly who he should be angry about. His joys, sorrows and mood was now in a saucepan together where his joys and mood disappeared in favour of a newfound grief and a broken heart. He let his blond hair fall over his face and he did not want some to see him. He felt the vanity and just the thought of the man who now sat one floor beneath him gave him nausea. _

_"Why ...?" He whispered to himself repeatedly as a hope of an answer which would never come. It was late at night. The time was not important since each minute had suddenly become longer, and every breathing heavier. It might not continue this way. __He got up, walked with a firm step toward the door to the room and opened it quietly. _

_"Roy?" _

_No one responded to his call and he opened the door. He slipped out of the cold and lonely hall and walked toward the bathroom. __His plan was presented. __He could no more. He would no longer offer others the pain he gave in just to be present. He would finish it, what failed him for a little over a year ago. He wanted to die. He opened the bathroom door and went to the bathtub. He wondered why his memory had come back just this evening, but it could be equally. He turned on the water and let it run. His eyes caught his face in the mirror remaining still hung in the frame on the wall. __He looked dead already out. __Suddenly he heard Roy's voice in his head. _

_"Shut up Roy ... it hurts ...!" Sharpened to himself. He heard steps behind in the hallway. He bent down and took a razor blade and thought no more about it before he placed it in her wrist and ready to end his life a second time. __A voice was heard. But he did not respond._

"Edward?"

The young alchemist heard his name echo in the small room. He turned his gaze towards his lover. Roy almost flew over the bathroom floor and grabbed Edward's wrist.

"What're you doing?" Yelled Roy.

"Let me go!" Yelled Edward back. "I can not do this anymore!"

In all the confusion lost Edward blade on the floor and turned her face away from Roy. The water from the tub was cold and had flooded the room.

"What ...?" asked Roy in almost silence.

"I'm in the way .... You have to let me go ... let me go and get on with your life! "

"I see .." Roy sighed and stretched out her hand for the blade. Few seconds after Edward peered into the water and saw blood. He thought briefly and not believing his own eyes, but then turned his eyes toward Roy. In his love's one hand he held the blade while blood oozed down his other hand. Edward turned his panic knowing glance at Roy.

"If you want to die, let me die with you ..." said Roy, smiling. "My life is not worth living without you."

Edward shook. He did not know what to do and when he saw Roy's blood ran a chill down his spine. He tried to think and with lightning speed he grabbed a towel.

"You're bleeding! Make it stop! Roy! "In all the panic Edward caught Roy's sight, and so an invisible tear tried to lift themselves up. Edward wrapped Roy's wrist into the towel and tightened to. _'I would certainly not give you more pain ...'_ thought Edward over and over again. He began to shake, though it was the cold water debt or whether it was the sight of Roy's blood, he knew not.

"Argh!" Came from Edward and struck his hand into the water and looked deep into Roy's eyes. _'This person ... will follow me to hell ... and stay there ... if I wanted it ...'_ and suddenly it dawned on Edward that Roy just wanted to protect him until he was stronger.

"Please Roy," said Edward in the particular tone without removing his gaze. "I wish that we both shall live! Death will not be an acceptable way to leave each other. "His eyes were full of tears, but managed nevertheless to lie down on Roy's lap. He grabbed his lover's bleeding hand and embraced it. "Do not leave me .... Roy ... I beg… of you…"

Roy leaned forward and hugged Edward and whispered, "Edward ... I love you ..."

"Oh, Roy ..!"

Edward sat up and their lips met. Although they found themselves in freezing water, none of them noticed it. Roy got up and went and turned off the water, took Edward into his arms and carried him into his room. The raven man stripped his young lover and dried him. Edward enjoy every second of Roy's fingers against his skin. A single groan escaped his lips in now and then.

After having dried his blonde lover's hair, Roy put his lover in his bed and put a blanket over him. So he began even to dry his own hair and change clothes. He gave Edward a kiss on the forehead and went out and dried up the water. The whole hall and bathroom was flooded, but he did not care. Now he knew that Edward was in his bed, and if he was lucky, his love already fallen asleep. He took care, however, to the wrist once in a while, and could feel a different pain. It did not really hurt, but it would still leave a scar and it would be visible. As a constant confirmation that he at any time would die in the death of Edward, if it was his lover wanted. He sighed, cleaned up and went up to his room again, but contrary to his expectations Edward was not asleep. Behind his golden locks could see his honey-coloured eyes and they observed Roy's movements.

"Should you not sleep? Roy asked with a smile.

Edward did not answer and Roy climbed into bed with him. There was not many seconds before Edward was in Roy's arms and tried his heat.

"Roy ...?"

"Hmmm ..."

"What will happen now ...?"

Roy kissed Edward on the forehead and cuddled closer to the blonde.

"We must take as it comes ... Now that you can remember what happened, we can start to take it when you feel ready."

Edward smiled and kissed Roy on the mouth. He blushed slightly, but not for long. Roy kissed him back quickly and together they enjoy a night of love's blessing.

* * *

"Roy ...? Roy ...? "

"Hmmm ....?"

"Hehe ... you fell asleep ..?"

A smile met Roy's eyes. Spring heat hit him in the back, while Edward's smile warmed his heart and with the sound of the playful kids wake him up. He had dreamed about Edward's return, but the reality had called on him. Edward's smile reassured Roy. When he thought back a lot had happened in the 5 months, but today was a very special day for him and Edward. Although Edward had been gone for a year it was their 4 years anniversary today.

Edward lifted layer and took a step out of bed. Roy could drool over the sight of Edward's naked body, but decided just to smile. Traces of the night had not gone away and Roy could see his semen running from Edward's opening and down the topside. Edward turned round and caught Roy in his daydream.

"Roy ...?"

"Hmmm ..?"

"You are completely gone again ..." Edward grinned. Roy just smiled, crawled over the bed, pull Edward closer to him and kissed him.

"Yeah .." Roy groaned. "I completely lost in you." They kissed passionately and even though Edward had planned to go and take a shower, he surrendered himself to his desire to Roy also since he was already wet from the night's lovemaking, it was not long before Roy penetrated through his opening. "Roy ..." groaned Edward with all his force and up to several times.

After the incident with the razor blade, Edward had become more open to Roy. They had started quietly with just making love at the night and Roy quickly found out that Edward had developed a tendency to confess things while he dreamed. Talking in their sleep for some people might appear unattractive, but Roy had never before heard Edward say _'I love you Roy ..'_ in such a short time. It warmed his heart to know that his feelings for Edward was reciprocated.

Edward's memory had begun to return faster now. Together they had visited with Alphonse and Winry in Resembool, and Edward was starting to remember things like where they used to play and for the first time in a long time he laughed sincere when Winry and Alphonse began to discuss something as stupid as coaches in Downtown. Edward had to wipe away tears from his eyes and was completely ridiculous cramps so both Winry and Alphonse had been quite worried. Roy had laughed to himself over Edward and could even have shed a tear of pure joy and love to hear her laugh again.

Edward had told Roy that he wanted to tell Alphonse about their relationship. Roy could see why and told him okay. One evening when Winry was gone, the three men sat down when Roy and Edward and opposite Alphonse had confessed that they had a relationship. First Alphonse laughed a little, but when he saw the other serious faces, he just smiled. He stood up and hugged his brother first and then Roy and assured them that their secret was safe with him.

Both men were incredibly relieved and took a few days later returned to Central, and now they found themselves in their new shared apartment. There had been 5 months after Edward had been found and their love was stronger than ever. Some people would think they were just good friends or work colleagues. The official motive for buying the apartment was so that Edward had a place to be when he began to work again, also to Roy better keep an eye on him. None of them complained, only officially, but unofficially they always ended up in bed and groaned each other's names until late at night.

It was not long to Edward had to start again, and of course he was unsure, but he also knew that if he just stayed at home he would be insane. Roy had even begun more regularly at work again, and Edward felt inspired by that when Roy came home he was tired, but it was in a good way and when Roy came home ... he felt very horny by just the sight of him.

Sometimes they both thought that maybe their relationship was based solely on sex, but when they were separated because of work, none of them wanted nothing more than to lie in each other's arms all night and be caressed.

"Edward?" Roy asked after they had finished with sex.

"Yes?"

"What would you like to do today?"

"Hmm ..." The blond man thought and thought. "I know it!"

"Huh?"

Edward sat up on Roy's naked hips and hugged him.

"I know it's a bit impossible ... but ..."

"But what?"

"I want to go hand in hand with you in the street ... where everyone can see it ..."

Roy hugged his beloved. Personally, he wanted to do the same. The long planning in order to keep their relationship hidden took much of their time and effort, but Roy also knew that if it came out it could have obscene implications.

"I have an idea." Said the dark-haired man. "Let us wait for the night. I can arrange that the light in our street suddenly goes out. It will give us at least 10 minutes in the dark together .. how it sounds?"

Edward smiled with his face and hugged Roy. They kissed each other deeply and felt both inseparable and with a little whisper Roy said: "Edward... What we do in life... Echoes in eternaty.."

**The End**

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So this is the end people. I hope you liked it. Leave a little review if you have the time. It warms my heart to read them.

TheYukiii~


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